What I've Become
by Countess of Abe
Summary: Zane Malfoy has graduated from Hogwarts. His life is going smoothly until he realizes he's longing for something he can't name. Shy and inept in the art of talking to the opposite sex, can he find what he's looking for outside of his sheltered magic world
1. Take Me Back to the Start

Disclaimer: All Harry Potter related characters, places and themes belong to J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury and Scholastic.

a/n: Well, here's the sequel. Don't hate me for taking forever! I hate myself enough for that. I hope you all enjoy it! The story title comes from the song Viva la Vida by Coldplay and the chapter title comes from the song The Scientist, also by Coldplay.

I have also changed my penname. I am now the CountessofAbe. :)

* * *

**What I've Become**

**Chapter 1: Take Me Back to the Start**

Boners. Erections. Hard-ons. Stiffies. Schlongs. Whatever you want to call them. The fact of the matter was that Zane Malfoy did not appreciate Wolf Lupin talking about them while they babysat.

"So, I thought to myself, how the hell am I going to hide this thing?" Wolf explained. "I was wearing some basketball shorts, and the heavens above know that those things don't hide diddlysquat. I swear I didn't know what to with myself. The girl is just standing there, waiting for me to say something and I'm trying to figure out how to inconspicuously untuck my shirt so that I can cover the damn thing."

Zane couldn't help but laugh, disgusted as he was with the topic. "What did you end up doing?"

"I just told her that I wasn't hungry anymore and left the stupid deli. I haven't had an accidental woody since those horrid first few years at Hogwarts. You'd think they would stop when we turn seventeen or something."

"Remember that time we were called into McGonagall's office and you got one right in the middle of her yelling at us?" Zane asked.

Wolf ran his hand down his face. "Oh, fuck, that was horrible. I think she thought I was turned on by her authority or something. It's not my fault the pair of thong underwear she had confiscated from Cecilia was accidentally left out on her desk."

"You're ridiculous."

"I know, you tell me that at least once a day," Wolf said with a smile. "I'm getting sleepy. When are your parents coming home?"

"It's only nine, mate. The night has barely started."

"You know how I get when it's almost time for the full moon," Wolf shrugged.

"Just the time of the full moon? You always fall asleep when you get bored. I think you might have narcolepsy," Zane laughed.

"Nah, we researched it, remember? Turns out I'm just strange. Plus, my dad's genes don't help much. Instead of turning into a werewolf, I just sleep," Wolf said.

"Well you and Blake share more in common than a seventeen-year-old should ever share with a ten-month-old," Zane said. "Same sleeping habits, same intelligence…"

"Oh, ha-ha, I'm dying of laughter, you prat," Wolf said with a roll of his eyes.

A shout was heard from upstairs. "ZANE! Deena won't leave me alone!" Lex, Zane's twelve-year-old brother, yelled.

"Deena, leave Lex alone!" Zane shouted back, "and don't yell! Blake's sleeping!"

"I'm not doing anything!" Deena shouted back. At the age of eight, she was the third oldest. "Lex is just being a meanie-head!"

"Lex, stop being a meanie-head!" Zane yelled.

"I'm not being a meanie-head! She won't get out of my room!"

Zane and Wolf heard Blake's shrill cry.

"I'm never having kids," Zane sighed as he got off of the couch and made his way upstairs.

Wolf smiled and followed his friend up the stairs. They walked to Lex's room where Deena stood with her arms folded over her chest, pouting and glaring at her brother.

"Tell her to get out," Lex said from his desk. "I tried pushing her out but she bit me."

"Deena! You're not supposed to bite," Zane said. "Mum said if you bit anyone again, you would have all your toys taken away."

"Lex was being mean!" she complained.

"Both of you are in trouble," Zane said. "Now just shut your mouths while I go check on Blake."

"I got him, mate," Wolf said from behind him, holding a quiet Blake in his arms. "Blakey loves his Uncy Wolfie, doesn't he?"

Blake reached up, grabbed a fistful of Wolf's hair and started sucking on it.

"What did I tell you about the baby-talk, Wolf?" Zane asked.

"Girls dig it," he replied with a shrug. "Don't they, Blakey?"

The baby only giggled as he pulled harder on Wolf's hair.

Zane ignored them both and turned to his other siblings. "Deena, please go back to your room. Leave Lex alone. Pick up your toys and get ready for bed. If Mum and Dad come home and you're still up, then you'll get into trouble."

Deena pouted and stomped off to her room, pushing past her older brother with a sniff. Lex scowled at them all in his adolescent way and stuck his headphones back in, ignoring them promptly.

Another typical night babysitting…

* * *

Zane swatted at the hand touching his face as he slept. When he slowly opened one eye and saw Hermione standing over him he grabbed at her wrist instead of slapping it again. "Sorry, Mum."

"It's okay," she laughed and sat next to him on the couch where he had been sleeping. Wolf was on the floor sprawled across some couch cushions, snoring loudly. "How were your brothers and sister tonight?"

"The same as usual," he replied with a small smile.

"That bad?" she said and brushed his hair out of his eyes. He stopped himself from moving away from her extremely maternal treatment. She couldn't seem to understand that he was getting a bit too old for her comforts. But he secretly savored every moment.

"Hopefully, they didn't break anything this time," Draco said, walking into the living room and removing his cloak.

"Nope," Zane said. "They might have burst my eardrums, but other than that, everything is in one piece."

"Thank you, sweetheart," Hermione said with a smile, "for watching them for us. Now, it's only ten o' clock on a Friday night. Why don't you and Wolf go out and get some air. I'm sure watching your siblings is not how you dream of spending your weekends."

"If Wolf wakes up, then we might go grab a late dinner," he replied.

"I'm awake," Wolf murmured from the floor, his face buried in a couch cushion.

"Then you better get up and go," Hermione said. "Don't stay out too late."

The two of them left after grabbing their wands and their wallets. It was a surprisingly cool night for July, and they walked quickly towards the busier part of Portsmouth which was only a few blocks away from the neighborhood.

"You know, I forgot to tell you that that girl lives around here," Wolf said, sticking his hands into his pockets and kicking at a pebble as they walked.

"What girl?"

"The one who works in Diagon Alley," he replied, "at the apothecary shop."

"Isn't she the girl who is always drugged up?" Zane asked.

Wolf shoved his friend. "She's never drugged up. She's just a free-spirit!"

"She told you that your eyes are two moons waiting to be eclipsed."

He groaned in response. "She might be a tad odd, but she's a real looker, isn't she? Her hair reaches to at least her butt… and that butt! I swear it was made for pinching."

"Stop it!" Zane said, shoving Wolf this time. "You disgust me. You have the personality of an old lecher preying on younger women."

"Hey! She's our age. I asked her."

"How many times have you spoken to her?"

"I don't know, maybe three or four times. Why else would I go into an apothecary? I don't need incense or healing stones or magical herbs from God-knows-where. She's pretty much the love of my life, Zane. I just don't get why she doesn't react to my advances."

"Because her head is up her pinchable ass," Zane said quietly.

"What was that?"

"Oh, nothing… maybe she doesn't like you, mate. Ever thought of that?"

"Um. No. All girls like me," Wolf said with a roll of his eyes. "Duh."

"Well, maybe this bird is smarter than all the rest. Maybe all those drugs she does give her extra brain cells."

"Oh, my God, Zane, she doesn't do drugs!" Wolf laughed, punching Zane across the arm. "She might be the next Mrs. Wolf Lupin, so watch what you say about her."

"You're the only male I've ever known to fall in love with every girl he meets. You're insane."

"I'm insanely in love," Wolf said with an exaggerated sigh.

This time, Zane punched him and then started to run when Wolf vowed vengeance. They reached the Peach Pub and Eatery out of breath and laughing like a bunch of rowdy boys. Each of them ordered a sandwich and a tankard of ale.

As they sat eating their sandwiches, Wolf brought up the subject of girls again, a topic Zane usually tended to stray away from.

"So, do you think Melissa will go out with me if I ask her?" he asked.

"Who on earth is Melissa?" Zane said, taking a sip of ale and brushing crumbs off of his shirt.

"She's the girl from the apothecary shop! How many times must I repeat myself?" Wolf said.

"I thought her name was Moon Flower," Zane said.

"No, that's what I called her until I could figure out her real name. Do you ever pay attention to me when I talk?"

"No."

"Wanker."

Zane smiled and took another sip of his drink.

"You know, one day I'm going to make your life miserable when you finally find the bollocks to speak to a girl."

"I speak to girls," Zane said defensively.

"No, you mumble at girls. There's a difference, mate. You're absolutely terrified of them."

"I am not!"

Wolf raised an eyebrow. "You have never gone up to a girl you thought was cute and started talking to her. Why not? What's there to lose?"

"I just don't like doing that," Zane finally said.

"How are you ever going to meet a nice girl if you expect them all to make the first move?"

"I don't…"

"Seeing as how you've only had one girlfriend in your entire life, I wouldn't finish that sentence. Listen, Zane, you're my best friend, and I don't mean to insult you or anything. I just want you to branch out a bit, meet new people, find a girlfriend, etc."

Zane shrugged and looked into the tankard in his hand, swirling the last bit of golden drink around. "Alright, whatever."

Wolf finished his drink and then stood up. "Come on, let's go down to the bridge on Canvas Street and hang around. You can tell me about how excited you are to be starting at the Daily Prophet as a junior correspondent."

"And you can tell me how much you hate working for my dad," Zane said with a laugh. "I'm not sure if you've realized this or not, but he's a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to his magitecture."

"You're telling me? I thought I would be ignored because I'm just a lowly intern, but he actually stands over my shoulder and watches me work! I thought Uncle Draco was strict before. It's nothing compared to his work ethic."

Zane laughed again and they talked about their new jobs until they reached the scenic Canvas Street Bridge, their favorite place in all of Portsmouth. The subject of girls wouldn't be mentioned again. Well, for the rest of the night, that is. Wolf had a tendency of always getting his way. An annoying tendency… at least to Zane it was.


	2. We Need to Find a Certain Something

Disclaimer: All Harry Potter related characters, places and themes belong to J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury and Scholastic.

a/n: thank you for all the reviews! Just because I don't respond doesn't mean I don't read them and appreciate them all! My inbox is a mess and I'm trying to sort my school stuff from my internet stuff from my fanfic stuff, so maybe soon I'll reply to all the reviews! The chapter title comes from the song "Something to Believe In" by Aqualung.

**Chapter 2: We Need to Find a Certain Something**

_ANNUAL MESSAGE TO THE MAGIC BROTHERHOOD: FILLED WITH GUARANTEES OR JUST EMPTY HOPES?_

_By Zane Malfoy_

_The outsized crowd at the Minister's luncheon came from far and near to witness the Annual Message to the Magic Brotherhood this past Wednesday. The Minister, Mr. Hartley Duke, spoke with vehemence and enthusiasm throughout the entire speech. His promises to the crowd included educational reforms regarding the O.W.L.S and the N.E.W.T.S, the standardized tests which all magical schools must administer; increased funding for the renovation of the courts at the Ministry; and finally, improved benefits for employees of both the Ministry and the British Magical Embassies all over the globe. Minister Duke was…_

Zane looked down at the words he had just written, scratched his head, crossed out several words, and then pressed his forehead against the cool wood of his desk in the corner cubicle at the Daily Prophet offices. He couldn't think of a punishment greater than being made to write articles about the Ministry proceedings. It wasn't really a punishment, though. He had done nothing in his few short weeks at the Daily Prophet to get punished. He was only a junior correspondent, so he got the work that nobody else wanted to do.

He loved the career he had chosen. He had spoken to Headmistress McGonagall before leaving Hogwarts; he had spoken to Hermione and Draco, and almost every other family member available before finally deciding to choose a job based on something he was good at rather than something that was expected of him. He loved to write. He loved seeing the words that formed in his head transfer themselves onto a piece of parchment.

He had always felt that he could express himself much better through writing than he could with speaking. When he wrote, he wrote with honesty, with feeling, with confidence. He had taken the first job offered to him that would help him grow as a writer. Along with the newspaper articles, he had his short stories. He had never shown anyone the collection of stories he had written, tucked away in a journal he kept hidden in the back of his closet. The thought of someone reading them made him uneasy. It wasn't that he was embarrassed by his writing or afraid that people wouldn't like it… he was just… well… oh fine, yes, he was afraid people wouldn't like it. The stories he had written were just so personal and some were bordering on the autobiographical.

He had written a lot of things that he let the members of his family read, but he usually kept the more private ones to himself.

Zane sighed as he read over the article he had been commissioned to write by the editor-in-chief. After nearly a month of working for the Daily Prophet, every article given to him to write seemed more boring than the last.

He looked up at the clock hanging over his desk and quickly jotted a few notes in the margin of his parchment before rolling it up and putting it in the TO-DO box. He would finish the article tomorrow and have it on the editor's desk by tomorrow evening.

It was Thursday. Thursday nights were the nights he told his parents and friends that he was required to attend a mandatory meeting with the editor-in-chief to go over his articles and assignments.

There were no meetings.

Zane walked over to the public floo pavilion on the first floor of the Daily Prophet offices. He flooed to the Portsmouth Magic Community Center where the offices of all magic issues were taken care of for the city of Portsmouth. It was a branch of the Ministry of Magic that most cities had to that were responsible for local magical affairs.

Right across the street from the Portsmouth Magic Community Center the Grand Seaside Hotel towered above the rest of the buildings at fifty-seven floors. Zane made his way over to the entrance of the hotel and walked towards the small restaurant located in the lobby. He caught sight of the woman he met every Thursday at six o' clock. This was their sixth meeting.

"Zane," she said, smiling widely as he approached the small table she sat at, "please, sit down."

"Hi, Pansy," he said, taking a seat across from her.

"How have you been?" she asked, taking a sip from her snifter.

"I've been okay," he said with a shrug as he kept his eyes on the clean, white tablecloth. His fingers played with the napkin ring.

"How is work at the Daily Prophet?"

"It's been really good. I've gotten to go to all the press conferences given by the Minister over these past few days. They were boring beyond anything, but I had to write about them."

"Do you dislike your job?" she asked.

Zane shook his head. "Not at all. I mean, I'm only a junior reporter, so I get all of the assignments that nobody else wants. If I wrote about anything else, something that interested me, I could write about it and then submit it for consideration."

"Why don't you do that?"

"I can't find anything I really want to write about," he answered.

She was quiet for a moment, clicking her manicured nails against her glass. "Tell me about your half-siblings. How are they?"

He told her about Lex and his frequent pubescent mood-swings; how Deena had finally learned to whistle and was thus driving the entire house crazy; and about how Blake had learned his third word, which was 'ball.'

She asked him about his plans for the weekend, his assignments for the Daily Prophet and any updates about Wolf and the girl at the apothecary shop.

"He thinks he's in love with her and he's only ever spoken three words to her at most," Zane said.

"He sounds like a treat," Pansy said with a small laugh. She looked down at her watch, which looked like it cost more than Zane's entire wardrobe. "It's getting late, dear. I will see you next week?"

* * *

Zane closed the front door behind him quietly and his heart nearly exploded out of his chest when something grabbed his leg.

"Shit," he breathed out in relief when he looked down to find Blake trying to crawl up his legs. He knelt down and picked up his brother, pulling his head back when the baby tried to grab his nose. "Where did you crawl from, you little bug?"

Blake drooled in response and pulled his eldest brother's hair.

Zane walked into the living room to find his parents relaxing against each other. Gross.

"Okay, you have company now, you two. You can stop being disgusting now."

"Always so jealous," Draco said, dragging his wife into his lap and raising an eyebrow at his son.

"Yes, I'm jealous of your gross parent love," Zane said.

Hermione laughed and held out her hands for Blake, only he wanted to be held by Zane, so he turned his head away and pulled his brother's hair harder.

"Wolf flooed here while you were at your meeting," she said. "I told him you'd get back to him as soon as you came home."

Zane nodded and sat down opposite his parents, balancing Blake on his lap and wrestling his hair from the baby's sticky fingers. "Do you think I could ask you two a question?"

"Of course," Hermione said. "What is it?"

He ran a hand through his hair, wincing when his fingers came away wet from Blake's drool. "I don't know, I've been thinking about this for a while now, and I just wanted to see what you thought about it."

"Thought about what?"

"Well, I'm enjoying my work at the Daily Prophet," he said. "I just can't find anything interesting to write about. They give me the most boring assignments, and I don't even feel like writing anymore. It's like… it's like I can't even think of anything to write or I'm not happy with anything I _do_ write."

"Writer's block?" Draco asked.

Zane scratched at his chin. "For a person whose entire life revolves around writing, writer's block is the worst possible thing, Dad."

"Maybe you're in denial," he replied.

"I can't have writer's block," Zane groaned. "I just got started. What does it say about me as a writer to already be disillusioned by my job?"

"Oh, Zane, it's quite alright for you to be uncertain about what you want to do with your life," Hermione said.

"But I _want_ to write," he said. "I love to write, but I want to write about something that interests me, something I can enjoy and be passionate about."

"Like what?" Draco asked.

"I don't know," Zane said with a laugh. "I feel like I don't know what's going on. I mean, I was at Hogwarts for seven years and when I wasn't at Hogwarts, I was here in Portsmouth or back on the mainland at the Manor. I mean, our summer and winter vacations were nice, but it was only in a vacation setting. I wasn't in those foreign lands looking for something. I was just on vacation. Am I making a lick of sense?"

Hermione said yes while Draco said no. "Ignore your father, sweetheart, because I understand what you mean. You haven't had a chance to explore your opportunities; in a sense, you haven't had been able to come out of your shell."

"Here we go with the analyzing," Draco muttered.

"Oh, just hush" she said back to him.

"He's just bored, Hermione. You don't have to think hard about it. The boy is bored with his job and he wants to go out and have a bit of fun. There, case closed."

"You think in such male terms!" she said. "Everything is just so simple to you and your little brain…"

"My little brain? Excuse me..."

Zane sighed and left the living room, taking Blake with him.

"Our parents are crazy, Blake. I think I should warn you from now that you have many, many years yet to put up with them. I wish you all the luck in the world."

"Ball!" Blake screeched. "Ball! Ball! Ball!"

Zane stuck his brother into his crib and left the nursery. He made his way to his own bedroom and dropped down to the bed. He put his hands underneath his head and stared at his ceiling, driving himself into a melancholy mood. It seemed like no one could understand what he was feeling. He had tried talking to Wolf, but Wolf didn't get it. His parents didn't get it either. He didn't talk to Pansy about it, because he couldn't bring himself to talk to her about anything that was too personal.

With a sigh, he sat up, walked to his closet and started to change into a pair of pyjama pants. He threw his shirt to the floor and sat back on the bed, dragging a large book from his bedside table. It was a book of short stories Narcissa had given him on his birthday a few years back. They ranged from action to humor to romance to mystery to anything really. He had most of them memorized by this point.

A swift knock at the door startled him from his reading. He called out for whoever was at the door to come in. Lex walked in, his headphones dangling around his neck and his face set in a frown. "Can I talk to you?" he asked Zane.

Zane put his book back on the bedside table and motioned for Lex to take a seat wherever he wanted. He chose the chair by Zane's desk, right across from his brother. "How was work?" he asked.

"The same as usual," Zane said, leaning back against his pillows and crossing his arms behind his head. "Are you ready to go back to Hogwarts?"

Lex fingered the wire of his headphones and shrugged. "Not really."

"Why not?"

"Promise you won't laugh?"

Zane nodded.

"Well, there's this girl…"

"Oh, Lex, I'm really not the person to give you any advice in this area," Zane said with a grimace.

"I can't talk to Mum or Dad about it," Lex said with a deeper frown than before. "It's embarrassing."

Zane breathed out a tired sigh and ran a hand through his hair. "Okay, okay, I'll try."

"She's in my year at Hogwarts and… I don't know, she's just… she talks to me a lot, and I think I fancy her, but I don't know if she would be my girlfriend," he said in one breath.

"Have you asked her?"

"No."

"Then why don't you ask her and see if she wants to be your girlfriend?"

"What if she doesn't want to be my girlfriend?"

"You'll never know unless you ask."

Lex thought about that for a moment and then shrugged again. "Okay. I guess I'll ask her the next time I see her."

"Is she in Ravenclaw with you?"

Lex smiled slowly. "She's a Slytherin."

Zane laughed and shook his head. "Well, Dad and Grandfather should be pleased."

"You won't tell them, will you? This is between us?"

"You know that, Lex. If you don't want me to tell anyone, then no one will hear anything from me."

Lex nodded. "Thanks."

"What's the girl's name?"

"Cassie," Lex said with a visible pink in his cheeks. "She lives in Portsmouth, too."

"Did you see her during the summer?"

"I went to her house a few times, but it was with our group of friends, so it was just like at school."

"So, you're friends with the girl?" Zane asked.

"It's more like her friends are friends with my friends, and so we all just hang out together."

"Does Ian know about your fancy for this girl?"

Lex shook his head. Ian was Lex's best friend, and also Donny and Oliver's firstborn. "I haven't told Ian; he'd probably just tease me unmercifully about it."

"Hey, what are friends for?" Zane asked, smiling.

Lex left the room minutes later, leaving Zane alone with his thoughts. Even his thirteen-year-old brother was better at talking to girls than he was. It was a humbling realization. It was also bloody embarrassing! When he had been thirteen, it had been awkward and annoying and a point in his life he tried to forget as often as possible. He hadn't even gotten a girlfriend until his sixth year, so at seventeen years old (his birthday being in September) he had finally mustered up the courage to ask a girl out.

He didn't have a lot in common with his first girlfriend, Brianna Denson, but he had thought she was pretty and funny and smart, so he had asked her out. The fact that she had said yes, and the fact that she had liked him back despite his awkwardness, had given him a boost of confidence he had desperately needed back then. She had been his first kiss and had even let him get to second base.

Wolf had nearly exploded with pride when he had forced Zane to tell him what had happened that night. He'd been so happy that his best mate had felt up his first girl. Zane wondered about Wolf's sanity most of the time.

Another knock at the door drew Zane away from his nostalgia.

Hermione walked in and gave him a reassuring smile. She picked up the t-shirt he had put on the floor and folded it. She couldn't seem to stop herself from looking after him. "Zane, what have I told you about sleeping without a shirt on? You could catch a chill…"

"Mum," Zane groaned. "Don't start."

"Fine, fine," she said. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

She took the seat that Lex had vacated and stared her son down. "I think I can help you with what's bothering you."

"Yeah?"

"All you need is to get out and experience something new. I think you should find a topic you enjoy and write about it."

"I've tried looking for a topic that interests me…"

"You haven't looked hard enough. You know your grandparents went to Middlesex in London and they still have their alumni passes."

"Your parents, right? I can't imagine Grandfather and Grandmum stepping foot on a university campus."

"Well, of course my parents," she said. "What if I gave you their alumni pass so that you can check out the library there, maybe sit in on a few lectures?"

"You can do that?" he asked.

"Technically, no, but it's not like they have locks on the classroom doors. As long as you have the alumni pass, you can get into any building and then just go sit in on any lecture you'd like. You might find something that interests you there."

Zane thought on it for a moment. "That's actually a really good idea. Thanks, Mum."

Hermione's face brightened with a wide smile. "I'm glad I could help, sweetheart. Now, I need to go tuck in your sister and Blake before they get too cranky to deal with. I'll see about getting you those alumni cards tomorrow."

"Night, Mum."

She got up and hesitated before making up her mind and striding to his bed to kiss his forehead. "Goodnight, Zane."

He watched her leave the room and smiled faintly. He would floo Wolf back in the morning and tell him about this new development. Maybe things were going to get better. With that thought, he turned on his side and fell asleep.


	3. Watching Your World from Afar

a/n: finally, yes, I'm still alive. Terribly sorry for the delay!! We didn't have internet for a month! But that's no excuse, here is the next chapter! The chapter title comes from the song "Strange and Beautiful" by Aqualung.

**Chapter 3: Watching Your World from Afar**

Holding the alumni pass in his hand, Zane shoved it into the pocket of his jeans after scanning it under the red light like Hermione had told him to. The plastic gate to the library opened automatically, and he passed through it, looking around at the walls and shelves filled to the brink with books of all shapes and sizes. He wondered if the books in this muggle university library were much different from the books in the library at Hogwarts. Well, of course they would be different, but Wolf had mentioned something about a book called the Kama Sutra he had once seen, and Zane was reluctant to believe him. Surely there couldn't be a book just about sex positions. He'd believe it if he ever saw it.

He had no idea where to start. He didn't want to look out of place, so he headed toward the first row of books he found and started skimming their spines to read the titles.

_Advanced Molecular Theory_

_Microbiology's Path towards Medicine_

_The Human Body under the Microscope_

_Spiritual Healing vs. Cell Recreation: Religion and Science Battle Once Again_

That last title looked the most interesting, so he took it down and carried it over to an empty chintz chair located by a massive window. The window overlooked the grassy area between the campus library and three other buildings, creating a rectangular plaza of sorts. From this spot, he could watch the students going from class to class or sitting on the green with their books, music players, and coffee cups.

He sank into the chair and opened it to the first page. His eyes darted back and forth across several pages, his mind opening to each word. He loved reading as much as, if not more, than writing. Reading took him to new heights, made him think of things he never would have thought of.

He lifted his head after finishing the second chapter and looked around the quiet space he sat in. There weren't many tables and chairs in this area, but each chair was taken by someone. Hermione had warned him that final exams were in session and that he shouldn't be surprised if there was limited space in the library and classrooms.

Near the window across the room, a young man sat with a black laptop computer, typing away furiously and muttering to himself. Zane watched him and was surprised to see that the young man hadn't blinked for several seconds. Zane wondered if the poor bloke's eyes were burning by now.

Two dark-skinned girls sat several feet away, whispering rapidly to each other in a language Zane couldn't place. They both had enormous textbooks propped open in front of them, and they seemed to be testing each other.

Zane's eyes moved on to the next desk where his gaze came to a halt. A vision sat at the table: a girl so captivating Zane had to squint to make sure his eyesight wasn't failing him. She must have been a fairy out to mystify him with one enchanting spell. She was not beautiful in the traditional sense; her face would never be caught on any magazine or movie screen, but there was something about her that caught his attention more than any model or actress ever could.

Her hair was cropped very short, pixie-style, and held no hint of a curl or wave. It was also very, very dark. It could have been black; Zane couldn't tell from a distance. She had a heart-shaped face, very much like Wolf's mum, but with the girl's short hair, her chin seemed even more pointed. Her nose was straight and small, and her eyes were wide, almost as if she was stuck in a surprised stare. She really did look almost like a fairy from one of Deena's storybooks.

Her eyes came up from the book she was reading, and Zane quickly looked away before she caught him staring like some creepy stalker. His heart beat a little faster, and his cheeks felt warm. He didn't like this feeling. Not one bit. She was just another girl. There was nothing special about her. He would leave this library today and probably never see her again.

He looked up again to take a peek at her, and she was back to reading her book, her slender fingers tapping the top of her head and pulling slightly at her cropped hair.

_Oh shit_. She raised her head and her eyes met his for a minuscule portion of a second. His heart nearly flung out of his mouth, it was beating so hard. She had looked directly at him! Holy shit on a stick, she caught him looking at her. Great, just great. Maybe the earth could open and swallow him up now. That would be nice.

He kept his eyes glued to the book in front of him, no longer conscious of the words or subject matter. He actually felt sick. He rubbed his hand across his forehead and muttered a choice curse word. He closed the book and blindly got out of his seat, walking as quickly as he could without breaking into a jog to put the book away.

There must have been a humiliation angel trailing him since he tripped on a folded rug between the bookshelf and a few desks. Lovely.

He nearly ran out of the library and onto the grassy plaza, hurrying towards the train station that would take him back to the Ministry of Magic. He didn't dare apparate with his head so clouded with mortification and confusion. He didn't know how he made it back home, but the important thing was that he was back in his room, on his bed, and covering his face with his hands. Maybe if he suffocated himself, it would all be better.

He heard a knock at his door, and he groaned. He didn't want company.

"Zane?" Hermione's voice drifted through the wood of his bedroom door. "Honey, can I come in?"

_No. I don't want to ever look at another human being again, thanks. _"Uh, yeah," he said instead.

Hermione came into the room and closed the door behind her. "I didn't even see you come into the house. How was Middlesex? Did you have a nice time?"

Zane slid his hands off of his face and gave his mother a small smile. "It was nice, thank you."

"Did you sit in on any classes?"

"No, but I think classes have ended for the term. Everyone seemed to be in the library studying."

She nodded and sat down on the edge of his bed. "Did you enjoy the library?"

"Yes."

She rolled her eyes at him. "Well, I know you have the conversational skills of your father, so I won't push too hard. I just wanted to know if you had a good time."

Zane felt like a complete tool for being short with her. She was too good to him. "I had a really nice time, Mum."

She smiled and leaned down to kiss his cheek. "Good. Dinner is in an hour."

He watched her leave his room, and then he remembered how inelegantly he had tripped when he had walked towards the bookshelf at the library. He was certain the fairy-girl had seen him stumble. He groaned again and covered his face with his hands. Life was so bloody wonderful sometimes.

* * *

After dinner that evening Wolf arrived at the Malfoy residence with Benedict Steeper. Benedict had shared a room with Zane during school and had become friends with both Zane and Wolf throughout their seven years there. He lived and worked in London now, so he didn't have a lot of time to come to Portsmouth to hang around.

"Well, don't you look happy to see us!" Wolf cheered as he jumped onto Zane's bed and started bouncing, careful not to hit his head on the ceiling.

Zane frowned at his friend. He was sitting on the floor and could practically see his bed springs breaking one by one. "I love it when you barge into my room. It's always so welcome. Benedict, it's good to see you, mate."

Benedict took a seat on the small couch in Zane's room. "It seems like it's been ages since I've been around. I have but one question, Malfoy. How do you put up with Lupin's antics on a daily basis?"

"My mum has always told me that I should respect the mentally impaired and embrace them with friendship," Zane said, laughing when Wolf jumped off the bed and pushed him to the floor. Wolf had Zane in a headlock when Benedict cleared his throat.

"If you two ladies are finished wrestling, I have some news to share with you," he said.

Zane pushed Wolf off of him and kicked him once for good measure. Wolf grinned and fell back onto the bed, lifting his hands to place them behind his head. "What's the news, Benny boy?"

Benedict smiled slowly and raked his hand through his dark red hair. "I think I'm going to ask Eloise to marry me."

Zane and Wolf exchanged a stunned glance. "Have you absolutely lost your mind?" Wolf croaked.

"No," Benedict said simply.

"You're going to ask her to marry you?" Zane repeated. "Sneezy Eloisey?"

"Her allergies have been very much under control since leaving Hogwarts," Benedict said with a scowl. "Listen, ever since I asked her out in our fourth year, I think I always knew she was it for me. No one gets me like she does. I can't even picture myself with anyone else. Lord knows I've tried, because what bloke gets married to the first girl he dates? When she dumped me in our sixth year, I nearly failed Potions because it was like my world had shattered…"

"Okay, okay, we get it! Trust us, we remember you moping around and being a little, whiny girl that year." Wolf said. "You really going to ask her? You're only eighteen."

"I turn nineteen in October, thank you very much. It's not really anything about age, Lupin. I love her. I can see us together in the future. That's all that matters to me. She makes me happy, she's the most gorgeous girl I know, and she makes me laugh. What more could I ask for?"

Zane couldn't help but feel a stab of envy. Why couldn't he find a girl like Eloise? He knew her well since she had been Benedict's girlfriend for forever and a century. She was a pretty girl with a sunny personality, and she kept his friend sane. Benedict and Eloise were sickeningly perfect for each other.

"Does she suspect you're going to ask her?" he asked.

"We've been together nearly four and a half years. I think she might suspect we would be together a long time. I just think marrying her would be a good move. I want her to move in with me since she's at my place more than she is at hers in any case. Might as well make it official."

"Um… well, congratulations, Ben," Zane said. "I'm happy for you."

Benedict smiled. "I'm happy for me, too."

Wolf laughed and shook his head. "Oh, fine! Congratulations Benny-boy! Can I warn Eloise that you snore like a bear?"

"I'm quite sure she already knows," Benedict said. "But, I thank you for the felicitations nonetheless."

"So can I plan the stag party, then?" Wolf asked. "I'm already filled with ideas."

"I have no doubt of that," Zane said from the floor. "I'm positive you already have several females lined up to take off their clothes and dance around for you while you slip various amounts of money into the scraps of clothing they deign to wear."

"You hold me with such low esteem, Zane. I'm heartbroken," he replied.

Benedict cleared his throat. "There will be no stag parties in the immediate future. I haven't even asked El to marry me yet. Plus, we know how Zane is with the opposite gender. If he met an exotic dancer, he just might collapse and die."

"You're too funny, Benedict. So funny, that I just might collapse and die from your humor alone," Zane said with an unamused glare.

"I think we should make a pact to get him laid before the year is out," Wolf said.

Benedict laughed harder; Zane's jaw dropped in speechless anger "You most certainly will not make a pact!"

"You are going to be nineteen in just a few short months, and you have never even gone past second base with a girl. We'd be doing you a favor."

"I'm not going to sleep with some random girl just so I can say that I've slept with someone. I actually have morals and decency. It's not like you're out there banging every girl you meet. You're a decent person, too, Wolf. Don't even try to deny it."

"I am a master of romance. I've slept with plenty of girls."

"Sleeping with one girl multiple times is not the same as sleeping with plenty of girls," Benedict interrupted with a guffaw.

"How the hell does he know?" Wolf asked. He looked at Zane. "Did you tell him?"

"Oh, yes, all we talk about is your sex life. Nothing interests us more."

"No need to be sarcastic," Wolf grumbled. "And for your information, Daniella was an amazing bed partner."

"Your ex-girlfriend from Hogwarts was the last bird you slept with?" Benedict asked.

"The only bird," Zane corrected.

"He makes it seem like he's still getting some," Benedict said. He laughed at the glower Wolf was sending his way. "Maybe I should make a pact to myself to get the both of you laid by the end of the year, you hopeless ninnies."

He blocked his face with his arms just in time as both Wolf and Zane jumped up to wrestle him to the ground.

* * *

Draco watched his wife brush out the tangles in her wet hair, spraying the floor and vanity mirror with tiny droplets of water. After nearly fifteen years of marriage, he still enjoyed watching her after her nightly shower. She would come out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel that was humongous and really gave him nothing to work with. She would proceed to put on her undergarments while still wearing the towel (something he wished she would do with_out_ the towel). She would then remove the towel (something he wished she could do earlier) and proceed to apply lotion to her legs, arms and chest (something he wished … well, hell, that was his favorite part really). After the lotion, she would brush her hair, and everyone knew that was fun for no one. He was sure it was as painful as it looked.

"Come to bed, please," Draco said, putting down his notepad and leaning back in bed.

She looked at his reflection in the mirror and smiled. "I haven't finished brushing my hair."

"I'm just going to mess it up anyway," he said.

"Good point."

"Hurry," he whined. "I have a problem you need to take care of."

She rolled her eyes. "You make it sound as if my only purpose in life is to take care of your _problems_."

"Don't even think about having a philosophical argument about feminism. I went through that once, and Merlin above knows that nothing gets rid of an erection faster than an educational lecture from you."

She threw her hairbrush at him.

He caught it with a laugh and jumped out of bed before she could blink, scooping her up from her seat and throwing her onto the bed. She tried to stifle her laughter, but her husband was kissing her neck and tickling her ribcage with his fingers.

"Shhh," Draco whispered against her skin, "we mustn't wake the young ones."

They may or may not have ended up making a bit of noise... enough to make Zane put a silencing spell around his room and cover his head with several pillows.

* * *

Zane shook his head as he stared out the window of the train taking him to Middlesex. He couldn't believe he was going back. He had told himself that morning that all he wanted to do was some research for an article, but deep, deep down he knew why he was going back. He wanted to see the fairy-girl again, no doubt about it.

_I must be masochistic making myself endure this humiliation to catch a glimpse of this bird._ He sighed and looked across the train to watch a pair of blond twin boys fight over a toy gun. _If the gun has bullets I can shoot them to stop them from screaming. Or I could just put it against my temple and put myself out of this misery._

Before he knew it, he was standing in the library browsing through a large assortment of books on anthropology. He had never even heard of the word, so he decided to grab a few books and start reading.

Now, of course, he scanned the area before walking to the same seat he had occupied last time. Thankfully, no one was sitting in his seat, and thankfully (but not really) the fairy-girl hadn't shown up. He relaxed into the chair and started reading.

Two books later, he found himself completely engrossed in the world of muggle human biological and cultural diversity. He was reading about a tribe of mystics from the American state of Alaska when a flash of pink caught his eye.

He looked up and found his fairy-girl sitting in the chair directly across from his, her blouse a bright pink color, making her light eyes appear brighter. She was literally three feet away from him. He could have burped and she would have heard it and probably smelled it. He quickly looked back down at his book and focused on reading instead of the watching her as she got out her own books and started to study.

It was as if all of his senses were magnified. He could hear every flip of her page, her even breathing, the sound of her pencil as it made marks on the paper. If he tried hard enough, he could probably smell her shampoo or a subtle whiff of her perfume. But he wasn't going to start sniffing the air like some deranged, rabid dog.

He didn't know how long they sat there, each paying attention to their own thing, not even looking up at each other. Well, Zane had stolen about two or three looks… every second.

Maybe he could say hi to her, or ask her how her day had been. He almost laughed aloud at the thought of him just talking to her out of the blue. It was definitely something Wolf would do. Not something he would do. Ever.

He pushed away the humorous notions and got back to reading, forcing himself to finish at least one more book.

The ethnolinguistics book had gotten so interesting that by the time Zane had finished he had looked up to find the sky outside black and the library nearly empty. The fairy-girl wasn't even there anymore and he wondered how on earth he could have missed her leaving.

He looked around as he went to put the books back to see if maybe she had just moved seats, but it looked like she was gone.

He smiled secretly to himself as he walked to the train station. After work tomorrow, he would be back. He would see his fairy-girl again… and that thought kept him smiling all the way home.


	4. The Ticking of Timebombs

Disclaimer: All Harry Potter related characters, places and themes belong to J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury and Scholastic.

Author's note: the chapter's title comes from the song "Cinderella" by Aqualung

* * *

**Chapter 4: The Ticking of Timebombs**

Wolf Lupin pulled open the door to the apothecary shop that was smack dab in the middle of Diagon Alley. It smelled like an opium den inside, but it didn't bother him. He was on a mission. He was going to get Melissa Peters to go out on a date with him. He had flirted with her on several occasions, and it was time to make his move.

She was standing at the counter staring at a multi-colored rock in her hand, her smile small and genuine. Her lips were pursed in concentration and her hair made Hermione's look straight. It frizzed and curled in every possible direction, looking like a dark red atomic bomb flowing down her back. She looked up as she saw him approach and her smile widened.

"Hullo, again, friend. Welcome to Herbert Herb Apothecary." Her voice was lilting and sing-song… and Wolf was completely smitten.

"Hello," he said.

"Can I help you with anything?" Her hazel eyes blinked rapidly at him as she tilted her head to the side. "Are you interested in our Jupiter Gems?"

Wolf seized his chance. "I'm actually interested in taking you out on a date."

Her blinking continued though her eyes widened slightly. They were lined in bright pink liner and shadowed with turquoise blue powder. On anyone else, it would have looked clownish, but on her, it looked eccentric and lovely. Wolf wouldn't have had it any other way, really.

"You do not even know my name, friend," she said with a tiny laugh. "How can you ask me out when you do not even know what to call me?"

"Your name is on your name-tag," he said with a straight face.

She looked down at her shirt at the green name-tag attached to her shirt. "How absolutely silly of me!" She looked back up at him and burst into the most beautiful laughter he had ever heard. "I feel like such a pea-brain!"

"Oh, don't be too hard on yourself, I happen to find your brain quite average-sized," he said.

_What?! Are you an idiot? Good going, Wolf. That was the smoothest line ever in the history of lines. God, you're such a prat. Now she'll never go out with you._

She scrunched up her nose and tilted her head the other way. "Your aura is glowing."

"Excuse me?"

"Your aura. It's glowing all different shades of blue. I like that about you. Your aura is very easy to read," she explained further.

"Um, yes?" He had never been more confused. _What in bloody hell is an aura?_

"My aura is usually orange," she said. "Blues and oranges have good compatibility. Greens and Oranges should never mix though… it would be absolutely catastrophic!"

_Yep, she's bat-shit insane. But, good heavens above, she's cute._

"I'm glad I'm not a green aura, then," he said, smiling his most devastating smile at her.

His smile didn't seem to be working because she just laughed. "Oh, friend, you can't _be_ an aura! You _have_ an aura. Although, many people do lose their aura once they stop believing in life. It's tragic."

"Listen, Melissa, do you want to go out with me? I'm a really nice bloke, and I happen to think you're very pretty. Would you give me a chance?" he finally blurted out.

Her blinking was adorable, he finally decided. It made her look crazy, yes, but it also was … no, it just kind of made her look crazy.

"What is your name, friend?" she asked.

"Wolf," he said, sticking his hand out to shake hers.

She grabbed his hand, but not in a handshake. She turned his hand until his palm was facing up and studied it.

_Great, she's a crackpot palm reader. God, why couldn't she be normal?_

She looked up at him, and he was struck by her eyes. He didn't care about normal, she was too damned pretty.

"Wolf, you are a kind soul," she said. Her fingers felt warm in his hand. "You're very tolerant of my strange qualities. I can't really read palms. I know I come off as a bit quirky, but I'm really not too crazy!"

He wondered if she had read his mind. He wouldn't have been the least surprised. He smiled and wrapped his hand around hers. "Dinner at eight, tomorrow night?"

"That sounds lovely, and I think you're a very charming gentleman. I would love to go out with you," she said in one breath. "I live right above the apothecary shop, in flat number six."

"I'll pick you up, then," He dropped her hand and reached into his pocket to hand her his business card. "If for some reason you change your mind or something comes up, you can reach me at this address. Most owls have a hard time finding the place because the house has a lot of wards set up around it, but if you give the owl the exact address, it will find me."

"I hope it doesn't come to that," she said. "I am very excited about going out with you. I haven't had a date since before I can even remember! I just can't seem to find many men with blue auras. I'm so very glad you have a blue aura."

"Yes, I'll make sure to keep it that way," he said. "I'll see you tomorrow, then."

She waved at him as he left the store and turned back to her mutli-colored rock once he was out the door. He watched her through the window as she blinked and scrunched her nose at the rock as if she were holding a conversation with it.

_Damn, she's one crazy witch. But double damn, I don't even care_.

* * *

Hermione picked up the small, crying child and looked her over to see if she had any visible scrapes or bruises. "Caralee, darling, you know you're not supposed to jump off the slide. You could have been very hurt."

Caralee continued to cry, burying her face into her teacher's neck.

Donny came up to the two of them and shook her head. "Another accident?"

"The poor girl can't help that she's clumsy," Hermione said. "Dear thing scrapes a knee or bruises herself far too much for my tastes. I'm thinking of putting her in a bubble."

"I'm sure there's a spell that makes child-safe bubbles…"

Hermione laughed and shook her head slightly, stroking the young girl's hair to calm her down. "Caralee is just our clumsy girl. We'll have to add extra padding to the play area after lessons today."

"I actually have to leave right after lessons. I thought I told you," Donny said. "Woody has practice late tonight so I have to take Ian to his Healer appointment. Since Hogwarts starts next week, he needs his annual physical."

"Always wait until the last minute, don't you, Don?"

"You know me so well," Donny laughed. "But we're still on for Saturday? You know I love when we all get together before everyone goes back to Hogwarts."

"Saturday is still happening. Tonks and Remus said they were coming back early from Spain to see the kids before they leave. I think it's sweet of them since Wolf doesn't attend school any longer."

"Those Lupins don't have a mean bone in their bodies. Even when Remus is in werewolf form, he's as tame as a newborn puppy. It just makes me miss having Wolf here as a student."

"You miss cleaning up impossible messes and being on the receiving end of numerous pranks?" Hermione asked.

Donny smiled thoughtfully. "You know he only did those things because he fancied himself in love with me. I don't blame him, though. I _am_ a catch."

"He seemed to think so, especially when he asked you to divorce Oliver and marry him instead. Even at the age of 8, he had a devilish way with girls."

"Now, if only Zane would learn a few things from him," Donny said. "It breaks my heart to see how shy he is around girls. Such a handsome boy shouldn't let his timidity stop him from talking to them."

Hermione sighed and placed Caralee against her hip as she walked to the classroom. "I wish he would break out of his shell. He has such a wonderful personality, and I hate to see his friends have girlfriends while he's stuck being a third wheel."

"Do you think he would object to a blind date?"

"Oh, yes. It would probably mortify him," she replied. "He's been a bit quiet these past few days. You know he's not usually reserved when he's with family, but I always catch him staring off into space, thinking quietly to himself," she sighed again, "I just want him to be happy."

* * *

Zane looked up from his current article as Deena flew into his room, her smile wide and her cheeks flushed with color.

"Zane! Play with me, please! I brought my doll and my boy doll to play," she begged.

He couldn't really refuse her when she was looking at him with her large, honeyed eyes. She worshipped the ground he walked on, and he would be the biggest cad to say no. "Alright, Deena, we can play."

She squealed in triumph and jumped onto his bed where they proceeded to play dolls for nearly an hour. Zane would make her laugh by transforming random objects into things the dolls could use, and then making the dolls move and talk with a spell Fred had taught him long ago.

Nearing the second hour of doll-playing, Zane finally persuaded his sister that he had work to do, and that he would play with her again soon.

"Can I sit on your bed and play, Zane? I won't make any noise while you're working, I promise!" she said, using that same pleading expression.

"As long as you don't make noise," he conceded. "I don't know why you wish to play in my room though when your room is much nicer."

She tilted her head and looked at him. "But I want to be here because you are here."

Well, she sure knew how to make him feel like shit. He deserved a punch in the face for being a horrid brother. He shouldn't have to take it out on his sister if he was in such a funk. It wasn't her fault that he hadn't seen his fairy-girl for over two weeks.

He had only been able to go to Middlesex three times in the past few weeks and each time he hadn't seen her. He was starting to wonder if he would ever see her again. On the one hand, he had been able to research new topics at the library that had sparked a lot of new articles. Hermione had been right, he had just needed to go out of his comfort zone to find things he truly wanted to write about.

He set his pencil to his parchment, preferring pencil to quill since he edited his writing as he wrote. Deena sat quietly, making her dolls whisper to each other when all of a sudden she and Zane both heard the tell-tale sign that their parents were about to fight.

"What do you mean, you can't make it?" Hermione's voice carried all the way to the bedrooms. "We do it every year, and it's tradition!"

"It's just a party, Hermione. I'm not going to lose my biggest client just for the sake of a damned get-together."

"Lex will be upset if you miss it," she said.

"He doesn't care! I'll be there when we take him to the train station, and it's not like I'm never home. I just won't be here for the going away party. Just leave it be, woman."

"You know I do not like it when you call me that. I just want to know why you can't reschedule. It's obvious you're just trying to get out of going to the party."

Draco's sigh was clear. "I can't reschedule when my clients are coming all the way from Tokyo. What would I tell them? 'Oh, sorry I can't meet with you, I have to go socialize with people I talk to on a daily basis.'"

"You don't have to be such a jerk about it. Fine! I don't want you coming to the party anyway. Go meet with your clients for all I care!"

Zane and Deena heard a door slam a muffled exclamation before the house was silent again. They looked at each other and shrugged. and Typical night at the Malfoy house.

* * *

Wolf whistled a ditty as he walked towards Zane's house. He was feeling on top of the world knowing that his date with Melissa was taking place tonight. He was going to take her to a new jazz café in the south of London. But first, he had to share some amazing news with Zane. Their lives were soon to change, and he couldn't wait to tell his friend about their fortune.

He knocked on the front door and jumped back when Draco flung the door open and scowled at him.

"Is Zane home?" Wolf asked cautiously.

"In his room," came Draco's terse reply. "I expect to see you at the meeting with our Japanese clients next week. I'll take a refusal as your resignation."

Wolf swallowed his nervousness down. "Uh, sure, Uncle Draco. I'll be there."

Draco moved back to let Wolf into the house and then stalked down the hallway. Wolf stared after Draco with a quizzical glance before turning in the opposite direction to Zane's room. He arrived to find his best mate at his desk and Deena sitting on the bed.

"Wolf!" Deena jumped up to hug him around his legs. "Did you bring me something?"

Wolf laughed and ruffled her hair. "Of course I did, Deeny." He pulled out a chocolate bar from his pocket and held it up. "A sweet treat for my sweet treat."

Deena jumped up and down, giggling as Wolf tickled her until she said what she was supposed to say. "Okay, okay, Wolf! You are the bestest in the whole world!"

He relented and handed her the chocolate bar. She sped out of the room with her newly acquired candy and left the boys to their business.

Zane leaned back in his chair as Wolf climbed into Zane's bed and closed his eyes. "So, what brings you here?"

"Why was your dad in such a surly mood right now? He answered the door, and I swear it looked like he wanted to do me in. Did you accidentally lose his wand again?"

"I was six when that happened, and I never lost his wand. I just buried it in the yard."

Wolf smiled at the memory and rolled over onto his back. "He seemed to be angry at something."

"Oh, he and Mum had a row. He's not going to the party next week and Mum got mad."

"Well, I'm not going to the party either."

"Is he making you go to the meeting or whatever?"

Wolf nodded, his eyes still closed. "It's a pretty big client, and we've had this meeting planned since February. The fact that your dad wants me to be there is a big deal. Usually, only the senior magitects are allowed to meet with international clients."

"Well, congratulations on that. All those years of doodling on your school notes has finally paid off," Zane said.

Wolf nodded and was just about to doze off when he remembered why he had come over in the first place. "Zane! You'd never believe what happened today."

"Melissa cancelled her date with you?"

"Why would you say something like that? Don't be a wanker," Wolf said. "She seems to like me very much, thank you. No, this has to do with a flat in Hogsmeade! Remember when we were talking about moving in together after Hogwarts? Well, an old friend of my dad's just moved to the Continent and he wants to rent out his flat."

"You serious? That's amazing, mate! We can finally move in on our own," Zane said.

"And he's giving us a great deal since he's known my dad since school, so it'll cost next to nothing to live there," Wolf explained.

"When can we move in?"

"Whenever we're ready. Have you talked to your parents about it?"

Zane rubbed the back of his neck. "Oh, not really. I might have mentioned it in the past, but I don't know if they thought I was serious."

"Well, it's happening, Z. We're going to be free from our childhood homes, ready to start our adult lives."

"Speaking of adult lives, don't you have a date to get ready for?"

Wolf drew the covers up around him and settled into the bed. "Yes, but I'm going to rest my eyes a few minutes. Be a dear and go away."

Zane laughed and threw one of Deena's dolls at his friend who had already slipped into a deep sleep.

* * *

That night at dinner, Hermione and Draco were still angry with each other, evidenced by the icy way they were speaking to each other. Clipped, stony words emphasized their annoyance. Zane and Lex tried to keep up a conversation, but it was apparent that their parents were in no mood for chit-chat.

Taking a sip of his water, Zane cleared his throat and put down his fork. "I have some news." He paused and picked at his dinner with his fork. "Wolf and I found a place to live in Hogsmeade."

"Hogsmeade? What are you talking about?" Hermione asked, her scowl at Draco turning into a confused frown at Zane. "You have a place to live right here."

"Well, we've been talking about it since Hogwarts, and I mentioned it a few months ago to you. We scored a really amazing deal on this great flat. Uncle Remus's old friend from school is subletting it to us."

"Would you mind if I checked out the flat first, Z?" Draco asked. "I'd feel better if I could look at the construction and the interiors."

"Not at all."

"You can't move out," Hermione insisted. "You are too young."

"What do you mean he can't move out? He's seventeen years old, and he'll be eighteen in less than a month. It's only customary for people to leave the nest after Hogwarts," Draco said harshly. "You baby him way too much."

"I do _not_ baby him!" Hermione spat back. "Why should he leave when he already has a home? He has a home-cooked meal nearly every night; he's with his family, and he's… he's…" Her eyes welled up and she pushed her chair back. "Excuse me."

Zane watched her leave the table and turned an accusing glare at his father. "Did you have to be so mean to her?"

Draco sneered and pushed his own chair back. "It is none of your damned business." He left the table too, and Zane heard the front door slam shut as his father left the house.

"Daddy said a naughty word," Deena mentioned between mouthfuls of mashed potato. "Mummy and Daddy are maaaaaaaaad."

"Finish your dinner, Deena," Zane said. "When you're finished, help Lex with the dishes." He stood up and leaned over to pick up Blake from his high chair. "Come on, Blakey. Since our parents are pre-occupied being ticked at each other, I'll put you to bed."

He gave his brother a bath, changed his nappy, and put him in his pyjamas. Kissing the downy hair on Blake's temples, Zane put him into his crib and turned off the light to the nursery. He walked down the hallway and paused outside his parents' bedroom. He knocked on the door and entered when Hermione called out.

"Zane, sweetheart, I'm sorry about before…" She sat at the bay window, twirling a strand of hair around her finger as she looked outside.

Mum, don't worry about it. I know you've been upset, and I understand why you don't want me to leave."

"Thank you for putting Blake to bed," she said, drawing her knees up to her chin. "You help me so much around here. I can't begin to thank you for all that you do for your brothers and sister."

Zane ran his hand through his hair and shrugged wordlessly.

She looked up at him as he stood by the bed with his hands shoved into his pockets. "Come here, Zane."

He walked over to the window and didn't say anything as she dragged him down next to her and threw her arms around his neck.

"My darling boy," she said against his shoulder. "I can't seem to let go. You'll always be my darling boy. Always and always and always."

He smiled against her hair and hugged her back. "I'll always be around, Mum. I'll only be a floo or apparition away. You won't even know I'm gone."

She laughed and squeezed him tight before pulling back. "I must seem like the maddest woman you know. I'll just miss you more than you can imagine."

"You still have three little terrors to spoil beyond reason," he said with a smile.

"Yes, well they're not my first child," she added with a poke to his shoulder. "Now, go on to your room and start planning for your big move."

He smiled at her and left her to her thoughts. He was really going to finally move out. It seemed like the door on his childhood was about to close. He couldn't have been more excited.


	5. Time, Make it Go Faster

**Chapter 5: Time, Make it Go Faster**

It was a modest dwelling on the outskirts of Hogsmeade, and it was officially theirs. Zane and Wolf had signed the lease to the flat a week after finding out about it and a week after Draco had the opportunity to look it over. It had two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a sitting room, and a kitchen. It was perfect for them, and they were understandably excited to finally be on their own.

"Well, that's the last box," Wolf said as he collapsed on their new leather couch. "Even with the help of magic, moving is a tiring business."

Zane looked up from the coffee table he was assembling. There was a reason he was a writer and not a magitect like his father, and that reason was scattered around him in bent nails and screws and the two new cuts on his fingers.

"You still have to arrange the furniture in your room," he pointed out.

Wolf groaned at the reminder and pressed his face into the cushion. "I think I'll close my eyes for just a bit before I go and do that."

Before Zane could respond, a knock sounded at the door.

"Our first visitor," Wolf mumbled, sitting up on the couch and running his hand down his face. He walked to the door since Zane was carefully sticking a screw through one of the holes and couldn't be bothered to get up. Wolf opened the door to find Benedict standing on the other side. "Well, well, if it isn't our newly-engaged friend."

Benedict smiled widely and stepped into the flat. "You must admit that I seem very sophisticated as an engaged man. I am someone's fiancé… that's French for bloody brilliant boyfriend."

"Actually, I think it's French for dimwit," Zane said from the floor.

"Don't mind him, Benny. He's just mad because he can't put a simple coffee table together," Wolf said.

"Why don't you use your wand?" Benedict asked.

Zane threw him a wry glance. "Wolf bet me twenty galleons that I wouldn't be able to put the table together without using magic."

"I hope you have twenty galleons to spare, Z. Judging by the plasters wrapped around your fingers and the nicks in the wood, you shouldn't be near any tools."

Zane threw a piece of Styrofoam at his friend and gave up his attempt at piecing the coffee table together. He would give Wolf the twenty galleons just so long as he never had to put any other piece of furniture together ever again.

"Oh, Zane, you admit defeat way too easily. It's just an itty, bitty coffee table," Wolf laughed. He picked up his wand and in two flicks, the coffee table was assembled. "See?"

"I should have made _you_ put it together without magic," Zane grumbled as he took a seat in the armchair. "I have a feeling I'm going to be driven to homicide or suicide in about a week's time just from living with you."

"Please don't make a mess if you choose to do either of those things. I don't think we can get our deposit back if there's blood in the carpets."

"So, this is basically what it's like to live with the two of you?" Benedict asked. "You bicker like a married couple. I wouldn't bring a girl home if I were either of you, it might make the other jealous that someone is daring to steal their man."

Zane and Wolf threw couch cushions at Benedict and ended up laughing when he whipped his wand out and flung the cushions back at them. Their mock duel lasted throughout the afternoon. They ordered in dinner and hassled Benedict about his upcoming wedding while he hassled them about being single. Wolf took great offense at that.

"I'll have you know that Melissa and I had an incredible first date, and she's agreed to go out with me again," Wolf said between mouthfuls of pad thai.

"How high was she when she agreed to a second date?" Zane asked.

"How many times must I tell you that she does not use drugs!" Wolf said. "She is simply an unconventional girl."

"Wolf, she wrote you a letter on bright pink stationary, which was delivered by a talking parrot… I didn't even know parrots could be used in place of owls."

"Did the parrot say anything interesting?" Benedict asked.

"It just said 'a letter for Wolf Lupin'," Wolf explained.

Zane started laughing. "When it left, it squawked and said 'may your dreams be filled with me'."

"It is obvious Melissa taught the bird to say that about _her;_ it just came out wrong," Wolf said.

Still laughing at his friend's expense, Zane mentioned one thought. "Yeah, I'm still positive you had a naughty dream about that bird, mate."

Zane wasn't laughing when he had to wipe off the pad thai thrown at him.

* * *

The house was quiet when Zane entered the foyer of his old home. He closed the front door behind him and walked to the living room where he hoped to find his parents. He found his brother, Lex, watching television in the living room. He took a seat next to his brother on the couch and started to ask him if he was ready for school to start.

"I guess so," Lex replied. "I'm just ready to be out of the house. Mum and Dad are driving me up a wall."

"Yeah? Why's that?"

Lex shrugged and fiddled with the remote. "I don't know, I think they're acting a bit odd lately."

"What do you mean by odd?" Zane asked.

"Well, you know they got into a bit of a row right before you moved out about Dad not being able to make it to the party before we go back to Hogwarts? Ever since then, they've been a bit… cold towards each other. I don't know how to explain it, but I just noticed that things haven't been the same since."

Zane furrowed his brows in thought. With all the business of moving he hadn't really noticed the tension between his parents, but it was extremely strange for them to remain upset with the other for such a long time.

"Who else is home?" he asked his brother.

"I think Mum is in her office upstairs. Dad's at work."

"On a Saturday?"

Lex raised his eyebrows in a meaningful look "I told you it's been odd around here."

Zane left his brother to his program and went looking for Hermione. He found her upstairs at her desk. She looked up when he walked in and nearly vaulted off of her chair and into his arms, smothering him with kisses and squeezing him a bit too hard.

"Oh, my darling boy! You haven't even been out of the house a whole three days and I already miss you beyond comprehension. Come, sit and tell me how living on your own feels."

Zane took a seat in the chair in front of his mother's desk and watched her face as she took a seat right next to him. He probably wouldn't have noticed anything different, but with Lex's words still fresh on his mind, he could see the stress lines around her mouth and the darker circles under her eyes.

"How are you, sweetheart?" she asked.

"I'm doing fine, mum. Nothing much has changed since moving out. Living with Wolf is not as scary as it sounds," he said with a small smile. "How are things here?"

Her smile faltered and she looked down at her hands before looking back at him. "Things are good here; the same as usual. Tell me about your work. Do you have any good articles you're going to write?"

He noticed the abrupt change in subject, but didn't comment on it. If there were problems at home, then it wasn't his business. His parents were adults, and they could sort things out on their own.

"I'm thinking of going back to the university to look at more books in their library," he mentioned. He wasn't going to tell her that he really wanted to go see the mystery girl again. There were some things a boy just didn't tell his mother. "I'm in the middle of an article about ancient magic in Mesopotamia, so I'll go back to check their history books."

"I can't wait to read it, Zane, it sounds very…" Her words cut off when she looked behind Zane. "Hello, Draco. How was work?"

Her words sounded forced, with not much feeling behind them. Zane knew now that something was most definitely going on. He watched his father's eyes narrow the slightest bit and his lip curl just at one end. "Work was fine, Hermione. How was your day?"

"It's been wonderful especially since Zane came by to say hello. It's so nice to have him back if even for a short while," she said.

"Yes, that's good," Draco said dull. "I just wanted to tell you that I'll be working tomorrow so I won't be around when you wake up."

"But tomorrow is Sunday. You never work on Sundays."

"Well, it's a big project. Our plans have also changed. Our clients from Japan won't be visiting as scheduled, but instead I will be taking a team of magitects to Osaka for a week."

Hermione actually looked more hurt than she had been before. "Oh, I see. Thank you for telling me. Dinner will be ready in about an hour."

Draco nodded once and turned to his son. "It's good to see you, Z." Then, he turned around and left.

Zane was nearly stunned into silence. He had seen his parents argue before, and no one could argue as vehemently as his parents. They were the arguing champs, but they usually always made up quickly, never letting their anger leak into days.

He turned to look at his mum, her eyes blinking rapidly as if to hold back tears. She smiled at him and gave him a hug with a kiss on both cheeks. "Say you'll stay for dinner, sweetheart."

He nodded and hugged her back before standing up and leaving the room. Something was going on in his old home…

* * *

Dinner wasn't as nice as Zane hoped it would be. Conversation was stilted, his parents barely spoke to each other, and Deena spent the entire time explaining to Zane the wedding party she had held for her dolls.

Zane left immediately after dinner, unable to take his mother's hurt looks and his father's coldness. He apparated to The Hog's Head which was only a few convenient blocks away from his new flat. The short walk gave him time to think through some things. First of all, his parents were completely psycho. They were obviously going through the argument of the millennium. Second, he was itching to get back to the university to research… well, he wasn't going to lie to himself, he just wanted to see the mystery girl with the endearing short hair and the pert little nose… Third, he had to buy Deena something since her birthday was coming up, and he had no idea what to buy her that she didn't already have.

He made it to his flat and found a note from Wolf saying he would be out for the evening and not to wait up on him. Zane tossed the parchment onto the coffee table and proceeded to his room where he shrugged off his jacket and pants and fell back onto the bed. He stared at the ceiling and listened to the sound of the various Hogsmeade shops closing for the night outside his window. He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep, but sleep wouldn't come.

He heard Wolf come into the house a few hours past midnight with the laughter of a girl trailing on the sound of Wolf closing the door to his own bedroom. Well, at least Wolf was enjoying his newfound freedom in living away from home.

* * *

The next morning Zane dragged himself to the kitchen after a restless night of tossing and turning. He grabbed a mug of strong tea and sat down at the small dining table to read the freshly delivered Daily Prophet. He read the front page and moved on to the articles written by the interns at the newspaper. There were three other interns besides Zane and they were all very good writers. He wondered if they felt at odds with their writing as he did.

He took a sip of tea and looked up when someone walked into the kitchen. He was expecting Wolf seeing as how he lived with Wolf and no one else, but instead of his roommate walking in, a tall girl with long red hair walked in, clasping a bulky necklace around her neck.

"Oh, hello, you must be Zane," she said cheerfully, sticking out a manicured hand with rings on every finger for him to shake. "I'm Melissa."

He shook her hand and offered her a seat at the table. "It's nice to meet you. Would you like some tea?"

"If you'll just point me in the direction of the mugs, I can pour some, thanks."

Wolf walked in a moment later, dragging a white t-shirt on and ruffling his hair. He kissed Melissa on the cheek and took a seat on the kitchen counter. "So, I've gathered that you two have met. What do you think, Zane, is she a keeper?"

He looked between them and smiled awkwardly. "I actually have to get going, big meeting at the Prophet, see you…"

Leaving mid-sentence, he nearly ran out of the kitchen before being embroiled in any discussion about Wolf's love-life. He dressed quickly and left the flat in ten minutes, avoiding the kitchen where he could hear Melissa laughing and the loud smacking of them kissing.

He wasn't envious of his friend… well, maybe a little. Seeing Melissa walk into the kitchen this morning gave Zane a certain impetus to end his debilitating shyness and finally get started on meeting a girl. The days of shy kisses back at Hogwarts were over. It was time for him to find some confidence and start living the privileged life he was raised to have.

He apparated to work and started on his latest article, not stopping until one of his co-workers poked her head behind one of the walls of his cubicle.

"Hey, Zane, would you like to go out to lunch with us?" Paula Kidstone asked him. She was another intern, a year older than Zane, and a bit on the plain side. She had always been very nice to him, so he gave her a smile and grabbed his jacket.

"Who's coming along?" he asked.

"Just you, me, and Nelson," she said shrugging into her robes. "Marcus is out sick today so it'll be us three. We were thinking of trying this new sandwich place in Middlesex that everyone says is really amazing."

Zane heard the word Middlesex and his gut tightened the slightest bit. There was absolutely no chance he would see his fairy girl at a random sandwich restaurant, but she did go to university in Middlesex, and just being in the same city was enough to make his palms just a bit damp.

Lunch was actually fun. He always enjoyed Nelson and Paula's company as they were both graduates of Hogwarts and close in age to him. He made a mental note to see if they ever wanted to hang out outside of work seeing as how he only spent time with Wolf, Benedict and his family in recent days.

Back at work, he finished up his latest article, sent it to the editor and checked the clock. Perfect. He had two more hours before 5 o' clock and he would use those two hours to go to the University in Middlesex and research for his article on Mesopotamian magic… and of course look for his fairy girl.

He apparated to a nearby apparition point near the school and started walking towards the library. He stuck his hands in his pockets as he walked and looked around the campus, taking in the sights of several students kicking a ball around and a group of people listening to a another student play a guitar on the grass.

He looked a moment too long at the guitar player because the next thing he knew, he had bumped right into another person. His hands came out of his pockets to steady the other person and his gaze met the last person he would ever want to bump into.

"Sorry about that," her soft voice said.

Yep, Zane had run smack dab into his fairy girl… and he was standing there with his mouth slightly open looking like a complete, speechless dummy. Perfect.

* * *

a/n: I'm sorry for taking so long! I know I suck, but life has been crazy and I will never abandon this story, I swear! This chapter hasn't been beta'd bc i wanted to get it out to you ASAP, so please excuse any spelling/grammatical errors. My other stories will be updated soon. Please don't hate me! :) The chapter title comes from "Like a Song" by Lenka.


	6. I Was Sinking, Now I'm Sunk

**Chapter 6: I Was Sinking, Now I'm Sunk **

He honestly couldn't believe it. He had actually bumped into the girl he couldn't get out of his mind. Zane didn't know if this was a good or bad thing, but he was going to take advantage of it using the little draught of courage he gained from seeing Wolf and his new girlfriend together the other day. Of course, he had said the perfunctory "excuse me" to her and watched her smile at him and nod before walking off to her destination.

_Well that didn't exactly go as planned._ He fidgeted and his mind was awash with ways he could talk to her as he sat in the university's library a few minutes later. He had grabbed a book about … well, he hadn't really looked at the title, he just didn't want to look like some psycho sitting in the library planning something. With a sigh he planted his elbows on the desk in front of him and his chin on his palm to make a decision. This was it; if he saw her again, he was going to swallow his shyness and introduce himself, maybe ask her out for a cup of coffee or something. The time for feeling sorry for himself and wishing he could be confident was over.

It was nearing seven o' clock in the evening, so he decided to bring his evening to a close. He would probably see the fairy-girl (he couldn't think of her as anything else, she really did look like one) another time, and he would use that time to go through with his plan of finally speaking to her. He lifted the other book he had tried to read off of the desk and was just about to stand when before him stood the one and only fairy-girl.

She tilted her heard slightly and pointed to the chair across from him at the table. "Is this seat taken?" she asked. Her voice was soft and quiet. His voice was apparently stuck in his throat.

"Oh, um, no, the seat's not taken," he managed to say.

"Thank you. This place has been so crowded this week since midterms for the summer session have started."

"Yeah, it's been crowded."

_Way to state the obvious, dummy._

She smiled and took the seat, taking out a notebook and several textbooks. "You bumped into me earlier, I think. You look familiar."

Zane cringed. "Sorry about that. I'm a hazard to others when I get lost in thought."

She laughed at that and he realized her laugh was perfect, just like the rest of her. Her hair had grown just a bit since he had first seen her over a month ago. It was still cropped short, but it was quite feminine. It suited her.

"My name is Zane, by the way," he said. _It's about time you introduced yourself to her. Good lord it only took a month or so._

"It's nice to meet you, Zane. I'm Tess." She stuck her hand out for him to shake, and he took it, praying to whatever deity was listening that his palm wasn't slick with anxiety. Her hand was small, just like the rest of her, and her fingernails were painted a soft blue color that matched the headband in her hair.

"It's a pleasure," he finally managed to say.

There were a few moments of awkward silence as they stared at each other. Tess finally broke the silence. "I hope I didn't interrupt your revising?"

Zane looked down at the books in front of him, his mind thinking of some good lies. "Oh, not at all. I'm nearly finished."

"What classes do you have exams in?"

_Oh, shit._

"Um, well, I have exams in… uhh English, and uh Maths," he mumbled, thinking of the first two muggle subjects that came to mind.

"Oh, are you taking Medieval English Literature with Professor Colden?"

_Oh, double shit._

"Not that English, just, uh, the regular one, you know." _Good lord, this can't get any worse. _

She looked confused at that for a moment and then nodded. "You must be in Thompson's English Composition class, right? I took that last semester, and it was such a bore."

"Yeah, that's the one," he said. He had to find a way to move the conversation away from his fake classes.

"For his exam all you really need to do is revise the notes you take from his lectures instead of the notes you take from your readings. His exams usually just cover his lectures," she offered.

"Thank you, I'll remember that," he said. "What exams are you taking?"

"Just two since I'm only taking two classes for the summer session. My first exam is in two days and it's for my Life Span Development course, and then the next day I have my exam for Biology. The minute that second exam is finished, I will collapse out of pure exhaustion."

He laughed. He enjoyed watching her speak because her soft voice would be punctuated by quick hand movements to accompany her words. They spoke more about her classes, whether she enjoyed them and which ones she planned to take in the fall semester. He made sure to evade questions she would pose to him about his own education by quickly asking her more questions once she answered. As a journalist, he was trained to keep a person talking about themselves for as long as possible.

Nearly an hour later Tess looked down at her watch and back up at him. "My goodness I cannot believe I've been yammering on about myself for so long! I've kept you from your studies, I'm so sorry."

"No, no, don't be sorry. I'm really the one who prevented you from reading, it's just that I find myself very curious about you." Did he really just say that? Was he actually capable of flirtation?

"Really? Well, I find myself curious about you, too. Though you haven't satisfied my curiosity one bit, Zane." She pretended to pout but couldn't hold it because she was smiling too hard. "You owe me a one-sided conversation where I get to ask all of the questions next time."

"I think that can be arranged…" he hurriedly spoke the next words before he lost all of his confidence. "Would you like to grab dinner sometime after you've finished your exams? We can celebrate the fact that you've survived them."

"I would really like that." Her hazel eyes lit up as they met his and she seemed shy all of a sudden. "When do your finals end?"

"Oh, uh tomorrow; so how about we go to dinner on Friday night? There's a pan-Asian restaurant in London that I've heard good things about. Does that sound good?"

"It sounds lovely," she said.

"Great, then I'll…" he stopped suddenly. He almost told her he'd owl her but stopped because he remembered she was a muggle. "I'll call you on the telephone on Friday to make sure we're still on."

She tipped her head to the side and looked confused again. He quickly wondered if he said the name of the telephone incorrectly… was it supposed to be television?

"You can just text me if you'd like."

_What in the name of shitsville does 'text' mean?_

"I'd rather call," he managed to say.

Giving him an understanding look, she wrote out of her number on a piece of scrap paper. "Here you go. I'll be waiting for your call."

He looked down at the piece of paper. She had written her full name along with her number. _Tess Howard. _"I'm looking forward to it, Miss Tess Howard."

"Well I think you have the advantage here since I don't even know your surname."

"Malfoy, my name is Zane Malfoy."

Her smile lit up her face. "I look forward to Friday, Mr. Zane Malfoy."

The heavens had realigned in Zane's favor! Here he was sitting on his bed, holding the piece of scrap paper with Tess Howard's phone number scribbled across in neat strokes. He had spoken to her! He had flirted with her! He had asked her out on a date!

* * *

He had to pinch himself to make sure this was reality and not some sort of charm, hex, or dream. At the bite of pain, he grinned. Adrenaline was pumping through his veins, and his cheeks were starting to tremble with fatigue from smiling so hard. It was almost midnight, but he didn't think he'd b able to sleep with so much going through his mind.

After an hour passed, Zane heard Wolf slip into the flat and walk to his room at the end of the hallway. He must have been alone since Zane couldn't hear another set of footsteps. A niggling bit of doubt entered his mind then… would he ever be able to bring Tess around to their flat? It would be hard to hide the fact that he and Wolf had no electronics since they never used them. The floo could erupt at any moment with a message from someone; their owls could drop by unannounced. So many things could give away the fact that he wasn't like her.

What would his father say? Sure, he had married a muggleborn, but Hermione was a witch, and Tess was one-hundred percent muggle. Lucius might pass out at the very thought of his grandson even speaking to a muggle. It was one thing to accept muggleborn witches and wizards and another to acknowledge the existence of 'that insufferably annoying sub-species,' as Lucius liked to say.

Zane would just have to keep this from his family for a while. Hell, it might not even turn into something big, though he never really saw himself flitting from girl to girl in a string of debauchery. He'd have to talk to Wolf about this, get his opinion on things before starting off on the wrong foot.

With his thoughts finally starting to settle, Zane turned out the light with a whispered _nox_ and fell asleep.

The next morning, he found Wolf in the kitchen eating breakfast and reading the paper.

"Anything interesting?" Zane asked.

"Come on, mate, you should be the one telling me since you see the paper before anyone else."

Zane shrugged. "I didn't see the paper from yesterday. I left work early."

"Is that right? Well, now you've got my attention. Where did you go? I didn't see you at all yesterday."

He couldn't hide a small smirk, eager to see Wolf's reaction. "Oh, you know, I was just out. Spoke to Tess and asked her out."

Wolf slammed the paper down on the table and shook his head. "Shut up, who is Tess?"

Zane laughed and started to tell Wolf all about how he came to know Tess: feeling bored with his work, getting the pass from Hermione to go to the Middlesex University library, seeing Tess from afar and finally after a few weeks, working up the courage to talk to her.

Wolf was stunned into silence. He stared at his best friend, feeling prouder than he had ever felt. "You're going on a date on Friday with a cute muggle girl… Zane, mate, I think I might cry."

They laughed, both digging into their breakfast before Zane explained his reservations about the whole thing. "I'm a little worried about her being muggle, actually. What if I do or say something that shows I'm not a muggle?"

"I don't know. You're going to have to be really careful. Are you going to tell your parents?"

Zane shook his head. "I can't. Not right now anyway. I mean, my mum would be cool about it of course, but I don't know about my dad."

"I won't say anything to anyone," Wolf said.

"Not even Melissa?" Zane asked.

"Nope, this is just between you and me."

Wolf could always be counted on to keep a confidence. All Zane had to do was not tell anyone else about Tess. He would have to take her out to places he was sure he wouldn't run into family or friends. Portsmouth was out of the question, as was Wiltshire where the Malfoy Manor was and where his grandparents lived. He would take precautions to protect Tess from discovery and protect himself from revealing too much.

Nothing could ever go wrong from sneaking around…

* * *

Hermione wiped her wet cheeks with the back of her hand. Draco was supposed to be back from Tokyo at any moment. She had tried to talk to him before he left but he just seemed cold and indifferent. Something was going on with him and she had no idea what. He hadn't touched her in nearly two weeks, ever since they fought about Draco missing the small party they threw for the kids before they went off to Hogwarts. What was wrong?

She sat on the window-seat in their bedroom, little Blake cuddled up in her lap as he slept. She looked down at her precious blond baby and stroked his hair. She looked up when the door to the room opened and Draco walked in, loosening the tie around his neck. He gave her a quick glance and stopped.

"Hermione…"

She turned away and looked out the window. _So now he wants to talk?_

"We need to talk," he said quietly. He was right behind her now, his nearness making her tense. "I want you to look at me."

"Why? Why should I do anything you ask?"

"I've been… I've been awful to you, and I apologize."

She turned to look at him then, clutching Blake tighter to her. "But why? Why were you being so awful to me? I've done nothing to deserve that kind of treatment."

"I wasn't upset with you, Hermione," he admitted. He sank down next to her on the small seat and reached a hand out to touch her cheek. "I was upset with myself," he paused for a few minutes. "Something happened and I didn't know how to tell you."

"What happened?" she asked. "What happened that was so horrible that you had to act like a complete prick to me for so long?"

His hands were squeezed into fists on his lap. It seemed like he struggled with his thoughts for a moment before he spoke. "A few weeks back, I hired a new receptionist for the office. She seemed very qualified for the job, and I didn't really have any problems with her. I started noticing that she was a little odd after a few days of her working with us. She would stare at me whenever I was around, and it was incredibly disturbing after awhile. I didn't think anything of it; I just thought maybe she had a crush on me or something…"

"Draco if you slept with her, I'm sorry but I can't forgive that," Hermione choked out.

"No, Hermione, I didn't sleep with her," Draco said, raking his hand through his hair. He looked out the window and closed his eyes. "The day you and I argued she had been waiting in my office in the morning when I walked in. She put an immobilizing charm on me before I even sensed her and she tried to undress me, putting her lips on my body… it was a horrifying experience, I must tell you. All I could think about was how this shouldn't be happening to me. How many men do you know get assaulted like that?"

Hermione touched him gently on the leg, but he recoiled from her and scowled, getting up to pace in front of her. "Draco, it's not your fault. Did she …"

"No, she didn't finish what she set out to do. I was able to think of the countercurse before she had my pants off. Wandless magic has never been my forte but I was so angry I was able to channel all that emotion into breaking the charm she had on me. I shoved her away from me once I had control over my body again."

"I'm sorry that happened to you Draco," Hermione whispered. She was standing behind him now, Blake curled up on the window-seat she had just evacuated. "But I'm even sorrier that you felt you couldn't tell me about it."

He heard the tears in her voice and he physically felt weak. He turned to her and wrapped her in his arms, feeling right in this touch. He hoped she wouldn't hate him for what he said next.

"I killed her."

Hermione jerked back and stared at the gray eyes so familiar to her, saw the pain reflected in them. "Excuse me?"

"I killed her," he said slowly. "I honestly didn't mean to. When I shoved her away from me, her head hit the edge of my desk and she died instantly. It was a fatal blow."

Hermione swallowed the fear in her throat. "What did you do?"

Draco turned his head to the side. "I couldn't tell anyone, Hermione. If I had called the authorities do you think they would believe she tried to assault me? I'm about a foot taller than her and weigh a good five stone more than she does. The only way she was able to overpower me was through magic, and she hadn't used a wand so there would have been no evidence."

"Oh my word, I can't believe this," she said quietly, squeezing his arms. "You should have still told the Ministry! This is a little too much, almost mind-boggling. I don't want to believe you could do something this ill-advised."

"Hermione, I panicked! You know how I get when I panic. I seem to lose all of my logic and all of my common sense, and this is no time to go into how stupid my decisions can be."

"What are we going to do?" she asked.

He could almost feel tears in his eyes at the fact that she included herself so readily no matter the situation. He could count on his wife for anything and everything. "I don't know. I burned the body, cremated it and threw the ashes at the port. I tried to use as little magic as possible because I don't need this traced back to me. This is a fucking disaster, really."

"Oh, Draco," Hermione dragged him back into her embrace. "You poor, stupid man. I can't begin to imagine what you must have gone through. She didn't hurt you, did she?"

"No, I was just bruised from when I fell after the immobilizing charm hit me. I'm obviously a lot better off than she is at the moment."

"Alright, alright, you've gotten rid of the body, there's no way anyone could suspect you of killing her, and it's over. Nothing leaves this room, Draco. You mustn't tell anyone."

"You think I'd want to tell someone? I didn't even want to tell you, and I trust you with my life."

Hermione smiled and smacked his chest. "You put me through all that mess, and yet you try and butter me up with sweet words. You are such a Slytherin."

"Yes, but I'm _your _Slytherin, and I need you to forgive me."

"We have to be very careful from now on, Draco. We've got to feign ignorance if anyone asks us anything about this receptionist of yours. I'm not even going to ask you her name because the less I know the better. You must say you know nothing of her disappearance if anyone should ask."

"It's good luck that I'm an amazing liar."

"Oh, Draco, that's not luck. You were born and raised to lie your arse off. Try not to end up in Azkaban, sweetheart," she said, dragging his head down for a kiss. "Never keep me in the dark again, or I will hurt you. Now, give me a proper kiss."

He quickly obeyed and felt just a little bit of peace rush back into his disordered, batshit crazy life.

* * *

um can we not mention how horrible I am for taking almost a year to update? because I seriously don't know how anyone could still be nice to me after I lost my muse and left the writing world to focus on boring things like work and grad school. I will not leave you guys hanging for long again, I'm sure y'all just want to know what happens to Zane and his fairy-girl, and what happens to poor Draco! Thanks for sticking with me, even though I don't deserve it!

the chapter's title comes from the song "Swimming" by Florence & the Machine.


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